Humans – We’re More Complicated Than Popcorn

I was explaining how popcorn works to my friend’s youngest daughter; an extremely curious 5-year-old. We watched the kernels hop around until they suddenly popped. I told her about the tiny amount of water inside that expanded with heat and exploded. Pretty cool concept for a kiddo to wrap her mind around. For some reason the whole thing reminded me about gender-reveal parties. Parents have created a celebration around revealing the gender of their impending human. Fireworks, cupcakes, chalk dust—all used to indicate if a boy or girl is expected. I’m all for parties that combine explosions and frosting, and I don’t want to be a buzzkill here. But gender isn’t an either / or destination. Cele

Back to School and Transitioning

Back-to-school season is winding back up. In stores all over the city, backpacks, pens, and other supplies are prominently displayed, replacing barbecue sets and lawn darts overnight. The starting school year brings so much potential—new friends, new lunchbox, new routines. What on earth does this have to do with gender? Glad you asked, follow me. The beginning of a new school year is a common time for gender variant kids to transition. There are a multitude of reasons, not the least of which is that everyone is starting at day one. Faculty are updating records and learning about their students. The kiddo in transition is standing in line with many other students to make a name change. That’

On Hannah Gadsby’s Stand-up Special ‘Nanette’

Last week, I finally watched Australian comedian Hannah Gadsby’s popular Netflix stand-up special Nanette. This week, I’m encouraging men in my circles to do the same. Not only because it’s amazingly well-crafted by a talented human (it is), but because it sheds light on stories that need to be told. Stories that connect people across labels and fuel how we interpret ourselves in the world. We are a culture of story tellers. It’s through these narratives that we design a shared reality. Until those living in the dominant culture can connect with these stories, they are missing key pieces of the puzzle. The challenge is two-fold: lure people out of that comfortable place, and then keep them r

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